Thursday, July 4

Happy Fourth of July




Top Ten Fun and Interesting Fourth of July “Facts”

  1. The Fourth of July is a uniquely American holiday.  All other countries just skip from the third to the fifth.
  2. George Washington once threw a silver dollar across the Potomac River.  He was able to do this because “A dollar went a lot farther back then”.  It was the first example of a president throwing away money.  Obama, of course, holds the record for throwing away the most money.
  3. That was a close one - If the Declaration of Independence was signed just one day later, we would be celebrating the fifth of July.
  4. There was talk of making the Fourth of July a Monday holiday like Memorial Day and Labor Day, but the influence of the powerful Association of Calendar Manufacturers prevented it from becoming a reality.
  5. I shoot guns at night on the Fourth of July because I think the fire coming from the end of the barrel looks cool and the neighbors just assume that someone’s lighting off fireworks.
  6. Heavy duty irony - The fireworks we use to celebrate the Fourth (along with everything else) are made in Communist China.
  7. Over fifty percent of long-haul truck driver’s income comes from smuggling fireworks from down south to pussy northern states where they are illegal.
  8. Eighty percent of Americans do not know all the words to the first verse of our national anthem, and 100 % do not know any of the words to any of the later verses.  Even Francis Scott Key did not know any of the words after the first verse.  This is also the case with Christmas Carols.
  9. Democratic constituents want the other 364 days of the year to be declared “Dependence Days”.
  10. Fingers blown off by firecrackers will not “just grow back”, so be careful, wear a helmet.



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