Ever since the roll out of Obamacare, we have been pummeled by articles and television news stories about how many people have since lost their insurance and have to pay more on the government plan. Obama's promise of keeping the doctor you like was indeed false, and there has been much weeping and gnashing of teeth, negative comments made toward our president, and a general feeling of unease throughout the land.
What I want to know is, when are you racist white crackers gonna quit complaining and realize the opportunity we share.
It is an honorable thing to suffer for the first black president. Don't you realize that this is your opportunity to redeem the country? Now is the time to look your black neighbor in the eye and say, "I'm paying more for health insurance as a way to apologize for my great, great grandfather owning your great, great grandfather." Then hug it out, dawg. Write that premium check with a smile! We're making history! Yes we can!
If your premium is too high, quit buying Starbucks every day. Knock off the bon bons. Tell Ronald McDonald his wallet will be a little lighter from now on. You don't need no cable TV. You don't need no fancy car. You don't even need no house! Turn your back on the frivolous emptiness of spend-spend-spend and you will be able to pay for not only your healthcare, but for everybody else's healthcare too, because it's time this nation got civilized like Europe. If it's good enough for France, it's good enough for the rest of us.
I have a dream that, in the future, black presidents will not be judged by the debacle of their administrations, but by the color of their skin, that we won't be hatin' or try and fight the progressive plan, because that would mean we still have a long way to go. I have a dream that when a black president is opining before a large group of people, that we will not heckle. We will not protest. We will sit quietly and take in the teachable moment being handed to is. Because we deserve it. I have a dream that the opposition party won't hold their ground against their Democratic opponents during a government shutdown, and will mercilessly attack those renegades who do, because to resist is racist, and we're bigger than that. We're 'Merica!
I have a dream that racist white America will cleanse itself from the past, and march forward into a bright future where we will take a step back because it's time to let the people who have forever been regarded as less-than to take center stage, and shape this country into what it was supposed to be, where we can stand by and watch the formerly oppressed get 'er done!
I have a dream that in the future, I will have less money for myself, and that's okay, because it's time not to be selfish. I dream of a day when there will be less prosperity because we have to support our brothers. I am my brother's keeper! And my sister's. And my cousin's. And my neighbor's. And my neighbor's children. And my neighbor's children's friends! It's a sacrifice. But a worthy sacrifice, like the one Jesus made, and if Jesus can sacrifice, then, by gosh-darn-diddly, so can you. If you aren't sacrificing, then you must hate Jesus. Why do you hate Jesus? Why do you make Jesus cry?
I have a dream that.....wait, what? You mean all of this is already happening?
I guess dreams do come true.
BRIAN DRAKE is a 20-year broadcast veteran in California and the author of The Rogue Gentleman, a thriller in the tradition of Vince Flynn and Brad Thor. Follow him on Twitter.