Thursday, April 16

"TOO SOON OLD"....

 

“TOO SOON OLD…….”

“Too soon old, to late wise” was quoted by old Ben Franklin. Old Ben was right about this statement.

Regarding how this applies to me, let me explain something about me. I have been accused (wrongly) of being a hypochondriac for which I take great issue. The truth is at times I probably do over medicate myself. If the instructions say I should take one pill, I take two. I figure it will work better if I do so.

This is definitely not a wise thing to do and after this week, I swear I will read more about the things I ingest into this old body of mine. One of our famous boo-boo’s was the purchase of some so called ‘seaweed’ soap that was magically supposed to ‘wash’ the fat from your body. I didn’t buy one or two bars (was afraid they would run out) I bought a year’s supply. And can I tell you those bars lasted way, way more than one year. Obviously, they did not work. Do not buy anything on Facebook no matter how good it sounds.

My mind is always searching for something to improve my health.

So, I stumble across this article suggesting that a new ‘miracle’ cure is good for the following:

Arthritis, allergies, athletic foot, asthma, acne, anemia, and anxiety, alopecia.

And that’s just the ones starting in the letter ‘A’.

What could go wrong here?

All I had to do was to chew up one large pod of fresh garlic every day.

Sounds simple enough, right? Good health, simple solution.

This was posted by some ‘well known’ doctor, who will not give out his name for fear of being ostracized by his peers in the medical profession for releasing this little-known secret that greatly strengthens your immune system.

So, not one to shy away from a challenge, I got into the kitchen and promptly pop a big old bulb of fresh garlic into the old pie hole and think…’what a clever man am I’ for about 15 seconds.

DO NOT DO THIS AT HOME…IN FACT DO NOT DO THIS AT ALL.

Oh, my God. Jesus, Joseph and Mary. I need help. My mouth feels as if the entire Chinese army came marching through and decided to stay for a week or so. I am at a loss to describe how my entire mouth felt. The first thing I did was brush my teeth, three times, no help.

The next attempt was to gargle several cups of mouth wash, same result.

Ah, ha….lets try some strawberries. Nope, nothing there either.

Many glasses of water, forget it.

My loving wife senses the agony I have put myself into and wisely suggests cough drops.

Thank God this woman has more sense than me.

I sucked on those cherry flavored things for almost two days before that nasty taste finally left me. Needless to say, my morning cough has been cured in the process. A positive note to remember.

Recalling what old Ben’s advice was. I just hope I live long enough to stop doing stupid things to myself.

Probably will never happen, will it?

See you next week….Peary Perry.

I cannot see the screen that you get if you hit the ‘subscribe’ button, but if it says anything about ‘donations’ …just ignore it and subscribe for free. This column/blog/rant/whatever is free and helps keep my mind active. Thank you for reading.

 

 

 

 

 

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