YOU CAN'T FIX STUPID...

 

YOU CAN’T FIX STUPID---

I usually start thinking about these blogs a week or so in advance. It’s a hobby for me and keeps this old brain of mine moving and active. I was all prepared to go ballistic this week on the amount of fraud we are seeing in the news these days when an Amazon shipment arrived.

As you know I have started gardening and I ordered some buckets to put a couple of plants in for a while. Please note these are small buckets, but obviously due to some previous lawsuit they carried with them a sticker reading “DANGER DO NOT ALLOW SMALL CHILDREN INTO THIS BUCKET”

Now unless the ‘small child’ is under the size of a 10 lb. turkey, he or she is going to have a huge problem getting any part of their body in this bucket. Children smaller than 10 lb. turkey shouldn’t be wandering around outside by themselves anyway. Just saying.

So, looking around I got to noticing all of the ‘WARNING’ labels we see on the things in our lives. You and I both know these are the direct result of someone being major stupid and then suing someone for their own stupidity. Since we have a law firm on every corner it only proves that Americans will sue for anything, resulting in ‘WARNING’ stickers being applied to almost everything. Things that most of us with any modicum of common sense would be cautious about.

“Caution, Hot beverages are hot!” put on a coffee cup.. We all know where that one came from, don’t we?

“Do not use while sleeping” on a hair dryer.  Duh?

This was on an electric drill. “This product not intended for dental use.” Bet that hurt.

I love this one… “Do not drive with the sunshade in place”. On a sunshade for car window.

“Do not use for ear plugs” on a container of silly putty.

The Rowenta Iron company must have had a lawsuit resulting in their warning of “Do not iron clothes on body.”  Ouch!

Folks who have small children should not have any  children if they require a warning that reads “ Remove small child from stroller before folding it.”

“Not dishwasher safe” on a television remote. Never thought about it.

“May be harmful if swallowed” on a hammer.

Peanut company has a warning to everyone.. “May contain nuts.”

“This product is not for weight control.” On a package of Life Savers.

And I saved the best one for last… “Caution, the contents of this bottle should not be fed to fish.” On a bottle of dog shampoo.

I have never been tempted to open the door on a moving train or unfasten my seat belt on a roller coaster. But I bet there are signs attached to those telling you not to do so since it is dangerous.

I truly believe that those of you who read my weekly musings will find these totally unnecessary and hopefully amusing. But I suggest to you that is it not sad to think that some of the very people who walk among us really do need information such as this?

At this point I don’t know whether to laugh or to cry.

See you next week…Peary Perry

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